"A Domestic"

Watching the white tablecloth drift through the air filled Eliza’s heart. She never shared this joy with anyone. It was her secret, her private sunshine, even while she felt silly waving her arms up and down to drape the table. After it landed perfectly, she fluttered the cloth just a couple more times, then pulled it tight over the table’s edges, flattening the wrinkles. She set out plates and cutlery for two.

Just as the chicken was coming out of the oven, cooked to perfection, he arrived home.

Edward Solsbury, Professor of Physics, looked the part. Pointy ears, large horn-rimmed glasses, and a delicate frame that his tweed jacket always seemed to hang loose on. But he walked with certainty, purpose.

From the moment he came into her life, they were in sync, two gears made exactly for each other.

Eliza couldn’t remember them having a single fight. Sure, every now and then, they’d disagree, but they navigated those waters with calm communication, coming out the other side with a deeper love for the other.

“Oh honey, you shouldn’t have,” Edward said, striding into the dining room.

“But I wanted to,” Eliza said, greeting her husband with a kiss.

“I love you. Thank you,” he said, wrapping his arms around Eliza and holding her close to his chest. It felt safe there. Eternity in his embrace would not be long enough. “There’s something important I’d like to discuss over dinner. I just need a moment to drop off exam papers in my study.”

Eliza sat and pursed her lips.

Steam drifted off the glistening breast of the chicken in the centre of the table, flanked by potatoes and fresh salad. Most important was the cheap wine. She still enjoyed the taste, even all these years after she’d tried to drive herself home from a college party and nearly backed over Edward in the driveway. The rest was history.

Edward stumbled into the room, his hair pointed in odd directions the way it got from stress. His tie was loose around his neck, and the upper three buttons on his shirt were undone as though he had come down mid-change.

“Honey, are you okay?” Eliza asked, rising to her feet.

“What? Oh shit.” He looked at his clothes as though noticing himself for the first time. “Appears I’ve gotten ahead of myself. I mean sorry, Eliza, I just have a lot on my mind. Please sit.”

Eliza hesitated, then sat as Edward assumed his place at the other end of the table.

“This looks delicious. May I?” He ran his hands over his hair to smooth it out.

“Go ahead,” Eliza said after a pause. “I think I’d like to hear what you wanted to say now rather than later.”

“Oh, sure,” he said, a large smile now firm on his face as he scooped salad onto his plate, “I think we should have another child.”

Breath caught in Eliza’s throat and for a moment she thought she would choke.

Edward carved chicken for himself.

“Edward, we discussed this. I can’t.”

“I understand, but it’s different this time.”

“I’m happy to adopt Edward, but my body can’t bear the strain.”

“Out of the question,” An edge of tension cracked his voice as he beamed at her. “This must be our child.”

“Out of the question?” Eliza put her head in her hands. The sound of Edward eating began to ring through the room.

“Trust me, Eliza, you and the baby will be just fine.”

“Trust you.” She glared up at her husband, the smile he wore hanging like a mask about to fall. “I trust myself and my doctors. The answer is no!”

“You stupid bitch!” Edward slammed his fist onto the table. The force of it sent a shock through her.

Eliza sat in cold silence. Nails dug hard into her knees trying to keep herself centred, her emotions in check.

Still, they came. Pouring out of her, tears and shuddering wails and gasping breaths.

With the slam of the door, Eliza knew her husband was gone.

Steam drifted off the glistening breast of the chicken that sat in the centre of the table, with potatoes and fresh salad sitting on either side. Most important was the cheap wine. Eliza still enjoyed the taste. It reminded her of when they first started dating. Of Edward the designated driver, and of her trying to go home on her own, nearly backing over him in her attempt to leave the driveway. The rest was history.

Edward came into the room, both arms hidden behind his back.

Eliza raised her eyebrows at him. She let herself grin at whatever mischief he planned.

“Now dear, close your eyes,” Edward crept toward her end of the table, careful to keep himself between her and his secret.

“Okay,” Eliza said, shutting her eyes tight to the world. She felt him turn up her hand and place something soft into it.

“I found these upstairs and they just brought back such pleasant memories,” he said, punctuating the statement with a kiss on Eliza’s cheek that made her jump in surprise. “Now you can look.”

In Eliza’s hand lay two teeny-tiny fluffy pink socks. She felt her heart melt. Memories of her daughter stumbling across the carpet in these, the constant struggle to keep them from going missing as she would tear them off in the stroller, and the pain it was to clean them.

“These are cute. Thank you, Edward, but I don’t think they’d fit me.”

“Not for you,” he said, throwing his head back and laughing much harder than Eliza thought her joke deserved. “But I was thinking they could be for someone.”

“You wish to donate them?” Eliza asked, needing the answer to be yes.

“I’ve been doing some research.” He knelt beside Eliza, gently placing his hand in hers. “It would be a lot safer now.”

“I don’t know what to say.” Eliza felt her shoulders shake. Her husband stared at her with a brilliant smile. “You don’t think I’ve looked into it myself? That I don’t wish I could. But I can’t. It nearly killed me and Michelle last time. I can’t go through that again, I told you.”

“Eliza, I understand but just listen.”

“No, you listen!” Eliza said, launching to her feet.

Edward stumbled back onto the floor.

“I settled this years ago. I can not and will not go through that again! How dare you show me these, trying to manipulate me!” Eliza tossed the socks into Edward’s face. Tears racing down her puffy red cheeks, huffing for breath, she stared down at her husband, who just looked at the discarded clothes in his lap.

Without a word, he stood and left. Eliza’s shaking breaths haunted his steps.

Steam drifted off the glistening breast of chicken that sat in the centre of the table, with potatoes and fresh salad sitting on either side. Eliza still enjoyed the taste of this cheap wine. It reminded her of when they first started dating in college. They met because Edward was the designated driver at a party. Eliza had tried to go home on her own and nearly backed over him in her attempt to leave the driveway. The rest was history.

With a crash, the door to the dining room flew open and Edward stormed in.

Eliza could barely rise before her husband was upon her.

His hands, so delicate, gripped tight around her throat, the fingers interlocking where they met at the back.

Confusion and horror overwhelmed Eliza’s mind. She couldn’t begin to form a coherent thought. Her husband, her beloved husband, was killing her.

Killing seemed to hang in her mind, and she felt her fingers strain for the table, trying to grab anything.

Edward noticed, and he thrust forward with an unexpected strength, toppling Eliza backwards.

Her head hit the hardwood floor.

She felt spit land on her lips.

Edward’s face was red with fury, veins popping, and his white bared teeth had drool pooling down them.

Clawing, kicking, and punching all occurred to her, but the world was growing dimmer and her strength was fading. She reached her nails toward Edward’s eyes but he leaned his head away. She did not have the energy to pursue him.

Eliza died.

Steam drifted off the glistening breast of the chicken that sat in the centre of the table, with potatoes and fresh salad sitting on either side. Eliza still enjoyed the taste of this cheap wine. It reminded her of when they first started dating in college. They met because Edward was the designated driver at a party. Eliza had tried to go home on her own and nearly backed over him in her attempt to leave the driveway. The rest was history.

Edward opened the door and leaned into the dining room, an ease to his posture. He looked refreshed, dressed in a t-shirt and jeans Eliza had gotten him. They fit him well.

A giddy excitement ran through her. She felt proud seeing him like this, knowing how excited he must have been to enjoy her cooking.

“Eliza, can you come with me? I’d like to show you something.” Edward turned and left.

For a moment, Eliza’s heart deflated.

He didn’t even seem to care about the food waiting for him.

With a sigh, she stood and followed her husband.

Edward walked ahead, through the house to the back door, then took a right turn to the tight spiral staircase leading to the back end of the second floor.

Eliza hated this staircase. It was so cramped, and she had to crouch not to knock her head off every step.
The only rooms near these stairs were a bathroom and Edward’s study.

“Where are we going?” Eliza asked.

“Just follow me, will you,” Edward said with a laugh before he smacked his head off the ceiling. “Silly me.”

Exiting the stairwell, the pair stopped before the heavy oak door. Eliza’s heart began to race. She had never once been inside Edward’s study. It was the one firm boundary in their relationship, that no one could ever go inside there.

“Are you ready?” he asked. When she nodded, he opened the door.

It was a cramped room made even smaller by a writing desk and several bookshelves. The room was in perfect order, with not a loose paper, stray pen, or open textbook to be seen. It was a normal and well-maintained study. Except, of course, for the chair.

This was not a normal chair. That one was in its spot, tucked into the desk. This other thing, however, sat in the centre of the room. It was nearly all copper, with mesh for the seat and welded bars for the limbs. A rubber tube ran between a canister strapped to the back and the top of a strange cap with a leather strap. The whole thing looked like an electric chair but with the strange addition of two cranks, one at the end of each armrest.

“What is that?” Eliza felt like she was being pranked, but a sense of unease bloomed in her mind.

“Please take a seat,” Edward said, pulling the regular chair from its spot at the desk.

Eliza did as she was told. Only as she fell into the offered chair did she realize how weak her legs had become.

“This is,” Edward began, standing next to the thing like he was doing a presentation, “my time machine.”

Eliza laughed. She had to. If she didn’t, she would have most certainly been going mad.

Edward just grinned, waiting for her to get it all out. “Now I understand how that sounds, but it’s true. This machine allows my mind now to go back to my body at any point in my past.”

“Can you affect the future?”

“Yes,” Edward said, nodding, still grinning with pride.

Eliza wondered if he had told anyone before.

“So why me? Why now?”

“Well you see,” Edward said, taking a deep breath before continuing, “I’ve been pretty far into the future, and it’s not good. For your safety, I can’t go into it, but I need another child.”

“What?” Eliza didn’t know where she thought the conversation was going, but this wasn’t it.

“I know how it sounds but you have to trust me. And no, adoption doesn’t work. I tried it. I’ve tried to avoid this fate many times. All my understanding points to this as the earliest moment that you and the baby can survive. And as the last moment for the baby to be old enough when the time comes.”

“Okay, Edward dear, I can tell you spent a lot of time on this,” Eliza said with an empty laugh as she rose from her seat, “but I don’t find it very fun and I spent a lot of time on dinner so if we can eat that before it gets cold…”

“Wait!” Edward shouted with such a sudden fury that

Eliza jumped. “Just let me prove it.”

After a moment of pause, he took her silence as agreement and moved towards the strange chair in the centre of the room. It let out a horrific metallic screech as he sat on it.

A strange queasiness settled into Eliza’s stomach as her husband strapped the helmet down over his head.
He began to rotate the handles at the end of each armrest. A terrible black smoke flowed from the bottom of the canister, and his body began to convulse as foam filled his mouth

“This is,” Edward began, standing next to the thing like he was doing a presentation, “my time machine.”

Eliza laughed. She had to. If she didn’t, she would have most certainly been going mad.

Edward just grinned, waiting for her to get it all out. “Now I understand how that sounds, but it’s true. This machine allows my mind now to go back to my body at any point in my past.”

“Can you…”

“Affect the future?” Edward interrupted, a proud grin on his face. “Well, the answer is yes. Next, you’ll ask why you, why now.”

Eliza opened and then closed her mouth.

“Is that proof enough? I can run this back as many times as it takes to get it perfect.”

The word perfect hung in the air. Something about that twisted Eliza up inside when she heard it. “How many times have you tried to convince me?”

“About my time machine? This is only the second try, but I’m showing you this because there is something much more important I need to tell you about.”

“You mean to say you’re only showing me this because you’re desperate about this other thing? How many times have you tried over this other thing?”

“Millions.” Edward shook his head and ran his hands through his hair. Dark patches were forming under his arms. “If this, the complete and honest truth doesn’t work, I don’t know what else will.”

“What is it?” Eliza, for a brief moment, felt her eyes water. With her hands folded in her lap, she dug her nails hard into her leg.

“Well you see,” Edward said, breathing deeply before he continued.

“I’ve been pretty far into the future, and it’s not good. For your safety, I can’t go into it, but I need another child.”

Eliza could tell he was nervous but something in the rhythm felt rehearsed. A rhythm she suddenly realized felt very familiar.

“Oh” was all Eliza said.

“Oh?” Edward said, shifting nervously on his feet.

For a moment, Eliza looked down at her lap. Her long brown hair became a veil across her face. When she looked up, her face was as bright as it had been when preparing dinner.

“Sorry, honey, this all sounds very important. Just a lot to wrap my head around.” Eliza said, rising to her feet to approach her husband and the machine. “How does it work?”

Edward let out a sigh of relief. He moved over the machine, holding up each key component as he explained it. “Well, it’s actually quite simple. You sit down and place the cap on your head. The machine will help pull your mind into the vacuum. Once ready, focus on a point in time, then turn the cranks to begin the process.”

“Huh, that is simple,” Eliza said, looking over her husband coolly. She had to be calm and do this right. “It took millions of attempts for you to try this, so it must be important and difficult. How many times did it take for us to get married?”

“Excuse me?” Edward’s face went pale, and Eliza knew she was right to ask that at that exact moment.

“How many times did it take for us to get together?”

“I think you’re losing sight of what’s important.” Edward seemed to be shrinking beneath Eliza’s cold eyes.

She didn’t know how he’d react to her anger. She couldn’t know, she realized. Their relationship was perfect, they never fought, not even over something minor. Until this moment, she thought her life was a miracle. “Do you go back if anything goes wrong? If I so much as disagree with you? How many times did you go back before we started dating?”

“I think this was a mistake,” Edward said, his eyes flashing toward the chair. He took a step and Eliza lunged.

She caught him with all her might in the centre of his chest, and he stumbled backwards.

He hit the bookcase hard and fell with a rain of textbooks. “Eliza,” Edward pleaded from the ground as he tried to get to his feet.

Not taking a chance, Eliza jumped into the machine and pulled the cap tight on her head. The metal was shockingly cold where it touched her skin. Only one moment came to her mind, and she began turning the cranks without hesitation. Sparks filled her vision as Edward rose shakily to his feet. The world around her was becoming flashing colours. As Edward lunged, the world went black.

Steam drifted off the glistening breast of the chicken that sat in the centre of the table, with potatoes and fresh salad sitting on either side. Eliza still enjoyed the taste of this cheap wine. It reminded her of when they first started dating in college. They met because Edward was the designated driver at a party. Eliza had tried to go home on her own and nearly backed over him in her attempt to leave the driveway. The rest was history.

Eliza’s whole body jumped as she tensed for an impact that never came. She was back in the dining room, really back. She struggled not to vomit. Bracing herself against the back of the dining chair, Eliza focused her mind on the only thing that mattered.

Edward opened the door and leaned into the dining room, an ease to his posture. He looked refreshed, dressed in a t-shirt and jeans Eliza had gotten him.

A boiling rage threatened to overwhelm Eliza as she looked at her husband’s smug grin.

“Eliza, can you come with me? I’d like to show you something.” He turned and left.

Eliza paused just a moment. When his footsteps had grown distant, she followed him, grabbing a knife from the table as she passed, holding it tight to her back, both arms folded behind her. The picture of a timid, obedient, loving wife.

“Edward, I have a question to ask you,” Eliza said as she stepped into the cramped spiral staircase directly behind her husband.

“Can it wait?” Edward sounded annoyed, continuing up toward his study.

Eliza felt a wave of nausea pass over her and rested her weight against the railing. Memories flooded her. A million-million tiny moments raced through her throbbing mind and pounding heart. Artificial moments, perfected through countless repetitions by a man she didn’t even know and who didn’t even know her. They were moulded together into a sculpture of reality. Had they all been a lie? Maybe, just maybe, there was a seed of authenticity in their whole lives. Eliza just had to find it by being honest first.

“It’s about your time machine.”

Edward froze. Slowly he turned to face his wife. His eyes were as wide as his face allowed, bright white.

“How do you know about that?” His voice was dry, each word coming out a cough.

“You showed it to me, so I took it back to see if it was real.”

“Oh,” he said. Eliza could see the tension leave his body.

“Well, I hope this has been an effective way of proving it to you.”

“It was, but it seems you don’t remember that I did it, because I guess for you I technically haven’t yet. Do you do that to me often? Go back to get what you want from me. How many times?”

Like a ripple in the water, Eliza could see the tension return to his body.

His eyes flashed like a cornered animal, and the muscles in his leg grew tight.

She didn’t give him a chance to act. “Was it millions?” She plunged the carving knife into Edward’s stomach.

Not waiting for an answer, she stabbed the knife into his chest over and over and over again.

Discarding the ruined weapon, Eliza took her time up the stairs. Now she could picture any moment she wanted, and she knew exactly when it was.

Sitting in the chair, she thought of nothing else and began to turn the cranks. Then she was there, sitting in the front seat of her old junker from college. It was a strange sensation to suddenly feel drunk, and even stranger to feel young. She hadn’t noticed how bad her hearing and sight had gotten over the years. Looking down, she grinned at the stick stuck in reverse. In the rearview mirror, she saw Edward running up the driveway, waving his arms. She wondered how many times he had practised this moment.

Knowing exactly how fast she’d go, how far she’d back up before stopping, and precisely what to say after it was all done.

She pressed her foot to the gas and did not stop.