Conor Mc Donnell is a physician and poet. He has published two chapbooks in Canada, The Book of Retaliations (Anstruther Press) and Safe Spaces (Frog Hollow Press). In 2018, he received Honourable Mention for The Fiddlehead’s Ralph Gustafson Poetry Prize, and in 2019, he was shortlisted for Raw Art Review’s Charles Bukowski Poetry Prize and was runner-up in Vallum’s Award for Poetry. His writing has featured in The Fiddlehead, JAMA, In Parentheses, Scrivener Creative Review, 580SpltLip, Carousel, and elsewhere. Other poems exploring Hollywood are forthcoming in Vallum, Grain, and Raw Art Review. Conor lives in Toronto with his wife and two dogs.
“‘We Are Shine’ is from a suite of poems exploring how we normalize and internalize violence and power hierarchies by repeat exposure through film and media. These poems call into question our unwitting role as observers of trauma and pain whereby, for example, a film as familiar as The Shining becomes less about the singular vision of one man’s descent into madness and more about the Greek chorus of spirits and negative energies that assail us in moments of weakness and isolation.”
The Interview
we are wait
we are have an appointment
we are way to making ends meet
five months peace is just what we need
we are quite the story
Closing Day
we are air feels different here
we are presidents movie-stars royalty all the best people
we are cosy for a family perfect for a child
we are show you the kitchen Wendy
we are getting to the ice-cream
we are eat your breadcrumb-trail we are show you trace of something
One Month Later
we are big-wheel chased by gyroscopes through corridor and kitchen
we are softball smacking smallpox blanket looking over maze
Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday & Monday
we are weather we are forecast we are snowstorm
we are want to finish work
we are in here where you don’t come in
not your we we are not your okay
we are omen exorcist Amityville
we are lines and signals down
we are big-wheel in the distance big-wheel in the close-up
we are covering our eyes we are silent
we are tip-toe we are Mickey in the bad-wolf den
two-fold in the mirror we are not what you see
we are tired we can’t sleep we are too much to do
we are wishing we are here
we are making up our promises
Wednesday 2:36
we are playing in hallway we are oracle archer plague we are Apollo at forbidden door
danger screaming in sleep in terrible dream we are Wendy running seeing our pieces
we are little boy in blue we are gashes at the neck we are you did this we are go for a walk
we are screaming breeze in turbine blades stabbing us in ear we are one deep at the bar
we are bargaining we are what’ll it be we are here’s what one by one
we are white man’s burden temporarily light good credit nonetheless & in the market for more
we are bargained we are sold we are settlers we are wagons we are fall and irreparable harm
we are could be a whole lot better we are nothing we can’t handle we are wisdom we are words
we are goddammit we love the lil’ son of a bitch
we are any fucking thing for him we are that bitch as long as we live will never forgive
we are completely unintentional we are could happen to anyone
we are momentary loss of muscular co-ordination
…
we are the fuck you talking about
…
One minute later
we are feet up on the pillow straddling tv we are looking up African lady we are impossible
we are shut down we are stranded we are frozen we are blocked we are straining to the heartbeat
we are deathbed grimace reality we are seizing in control we are Jack’s white hand
on lime-green door we are naked in water we are grinning like goons we are
dribble down our self we are shaking uncontrollably we are seeing from Miami
we are crossing closing distance we are bloody in our ears we are touched and we are touching
we are kissed and we are kissing Baba Yaga of the bathtub we are rotten on the breath
we are in and we are laughing we are waiting
we are here when you will call us
…
we are what about the bruises we are did it to himself we are no other explanation
we are episode he had
we are get out we are not going to let you fuck this up
…
we are tin-cans in the kitchen we are music in dead speaker we are midnight stars and you
we are good to be back we are orders from the house we are kind of man who likes to know
we are anything you say we are awful mess that tends to stain we are most important soiree
we are married we are caretaker we are always have been here
we are very great talent being used against the will we are wilful
it’s the mother we are correcting her
…
we are coming down the mountain
we are Tony warning Danny
we are Danny gone away
we are try again later
Thursday 8 a.m.
we are intercontinental
we are calling scatman back
we are all play and no work
we are dullest boy is jack
we are moral
we are contract
we are principle & ethic
we are not gonna hurt you we are
gimme the bat we are GODDAMN
we are polish floor with back of head
we are what are you doing we
are let me out of
here we are what
never happened we are hurt
real bad
we are dizzy don’t
leave we here we are don’t run
through house with knives
4 p.m.
we are passed out in the peanuts
we are business we discussed
we are one more chance
we are no greater pleasure
harshest possible manner
we are good as our word
we are scatman in a snowcat
we are reading in the mirror
we are Danny just got back
we are at the door with Jack
we are sliding out the window
we are come-out come-out wherever you are
we are little pigs let me come in
we are blow your house down Wendy
we are chopping we are in
we are cavalry come
we are Danny running Jack limping Wendy whimpering scatman calling Jack swinging scatman falling
Danny screaming
we are show ourselves to Wendy we are footprints in the snow we are floodlights in the storm
we are limping into labyrinth we are beast and boiling rage we are showing Wendy Wendy sees
we are corpses in the lobby we are blow-jobs in a bear-suit we are clever boy covering tracks
we are bleeding in the lift-shaft we are axeman enters maze we are Jack the Giant Killer
we are fi-fo-fum we are plunging ever deeper we are not the only one we are howling killer-clown
we are family asunder we are finding wrong way out we are freezing we are jackfrost
we are waiting to be told we are always to be here we are no sad snowman we are no sorry
we are shining and Wendy in spring in sun-time we are shine again
